What did everyone think of 'Rockford Springs'? My favorite character was Edna. I liked how she knew deep down she wasn't going to make it too far with Earl. She just went along with him at first to prove to herself she was still brave, but then when she was faced with the real prospect of starting over she just couldn't do it. It reminded me of a little kid who decides to run away, tells everyone what he is doing, makes a big scene, then ends up circling the block and returning home for dinner. I liked this story better than 'Gryphon'. ~ Wendy
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Saturday, June 28, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Gryphon
Things I like about good short stories (including Gryphon):
- the specific details of the story, such as:
a) setting (place and time/historical setting/social setting/cultural setting)
b) the development of the main characters in terms of developing a more rounded understanding of the world and people around them and well as themselves
c) the development of tension/conflict through plot
d) perspective and tone (3rd person/cynical, 1st person/whimsical, past tense 1st person/stoic, etc.)
- the creativity of the of the story, i.e. it better be original
- the range of grasp (emotions, culture, subject, theme, etc.)
- structure/hierarchy of detail
Given, this is merely an overview, and my overview at that, so it's definitely subjective. Whatever good is found is always good as long as it isn't used up.
Also, I don't think stories should be read in regards to why we like them as readers. Part of the fun of short stories for me is reading them as a writer.
What I especially like about Gryphon are all the subtle details. The school setting, the otherness of the substitute teacher, children as characters and the focus on their relationships with adults, the tension in discomfort, the non-judgmental, descriptive tone of the narrator, the mythology and lore, all these things make Gryphon fun to read.
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- the specific details of the story, such as:
a) setting (place and time/historical setting/social setting/cultural setting)
b) the development of the main characters in terms of developing a more rounded understanding of the world and people around them and well as themselves
c) the development of tension/conflict through plot
d) perspective and tone (3rd person/cynical, 1st person/whimsical, past tense 1st person/stoic, etc.)
- the creativity of the of the story, i.e. it better be original
- the range of grasp (emotions, culture, subject, theme, etc.)
- structure/hierarchy of detail
Given, this is merely an overview, and my overview at that, so it's definitely subjective. Whatever good is found is always good as long as it isn't used up.
Also, I don't think stories should be read in regards to why we like them as readers. Part of the fun of short stories for me is reading them as a writer.
What I especially like about Gryphon are all the subtle details. The school setting, the otherness of the substitute teacher, children as characters and the focus on their relationships with adults, the tension in discomfort, the non-judgmental, descriptive tone of the narrator, the mythology and lore, all these things make Gryphon fun to read.
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Gryphon
I am not really sure what I thought of this story ‘Gryphon’. I honestly didn’t see the point. I understand that this substitute teacher introduced the school children to more abstract thinking but other than that… I am going to re-read it a few more times but this was my first thoughts. What did everyone else think? What am I missing?
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Monday, June 23, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Last Wednesday the 18th
Hi Jim - Yes we were suppose to turn in our response paper to Big Me on Wednesday. I wasn't there, so my assignment will be late. Are you sure you are going to drop? Sometimes things are hard in the beginning, but I am getting into the fast pace of things, because it does not allow me time to 2nd guess every damn sentence I write. None of us are professionals (yet) and we all start somewhere. Plus, just think of all the free advise we will get from everyone and it will be honest because we really don't know too much about each other so we can't 'fill in the blanks'.
Good Luck ~ Wendy
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Good Luck ~ Wendy
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Last Wednesday (the 18th)
Hi Jason,
As I understood the assignments (someone correct me if I got it wrong), we should have turned in a response paper for 'Big Me' already, and a response paper on 'Gryphon' is due on Monday.
Professor Crowder is now allowing us to kill off our characters. He hinted that he would love to see an old west / cowboy / wild west story, and if we want to get on his bad side, we should immerse him in a world of elves in our short stories. He wants us to write literary fiction, as opposed to popular fiction (don't ask me, I'm still trying to figure it out).
Thanks to all of the feedback in class, especially from those that contribute a lot. I am still a beginner at writing and don't have a strong background in english, so if I'm mostly quiet in class, it's not because I don't care or don't want to give good ideas, I just think that the more experienced writers can give better advice than I can.
Professor Crowder asked us to be more critical during the workshops, and I understand his reasoning on this. I do fear, however, that if we don't find at least one or two positive things to accompany the criticisms, that some of us might get discouraged from writing. Maybe that's not a professional way to look at it, but that's my two cents. He did say we could have a 'love fest' here, to counterbalance the criticism, but it doesn't look like we have many folks posting here.
I may have to drop the course. Between a full-time job and a chronically sick wife, whose health has taken a turn for the worse lately, I am having trouble keeping up on the assignments. Still, I am enjoying everyone's stories, and it amazes me that we 'amateur' writers are able to produce such entertaining stories, even though many might not be totally polished.
Thanks to All
Read more!
As I understood the assignments (someone correct me if I got it wrong), we should have turned in a response paper for 'Big Me' already, and a response paper on 'Gryphon' is due on Monday.
Professor Crowder is now allowing us to kill off our characters. He hinted that he would love to see an old west / cowboy / wild west story, and if we want to get on his bad side, we should immerse him in a world of elves in our short stories. He wants us to write literary fiction, as opposed to popular fiction (don't ask me, I'm still trying to figure it out).
Thanks to all of the feedback in class, especially from those that contribute a lot. I am still a beginner at writing and don't have a strong background in english, so if I'm mostly quiet in class, it's not because I don't care or don't want to give good ideas, I just think that the more experienced writers can give better advice than I can.
Professor Crowder asked us to be more critical during the workshops, and I understand his reasoning on this. I do fear, however, that if we don't find at least one or two positive things to accompany the criticisms, that some of us might get discouraged from writing. Maybe that's not a professional way to look at it, but that's my two cents. He did say we could have a 'love fest' here, to counterbalance the criticism, but it doesn't look like we have many folks posting here.
I may have to drop the course. Between a full-time job and a chronically sick wife, whose health has taken a turn for the worse lately, I am having trouble keeping up on the assignments. Still, I am enjoying everyone's stories, and it amazes me that we 'amateur' writers are able to produce such entertaining stories, even though many might not be totally polished.
Thanks to All
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Friday, June 20, 2008
Next Week's Story
I was absent on Wednesday and I'm wondering if there was any kind of prompt assigned in class for our next stories.
Jason
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Jason
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Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Wednesday Submission
I won't be in class Wednesday to submit my story, so here it is now.
Jason Conde
18 June 2008
English 410
Prof. Crowder
"Someone stole it, Boss?" I ask as I double-line the trash can.
"Well, how else would it be lost. You think I'd misplace it?"
"No, Boss."
"Then how would it be lost?"
"You're right, Boss. I just didn't think of it." I laugh nervously as he dusts the electrical wires behind the desk. It's important for Boss that I take the dusting seriously. Boss once said, "Dust is like kindling. All you need is a spark and the whole thing burns."
That night Evelyn says, "Boy wants to know if you can pull strings with Boss so he can move to the cafeteria." Boy is Evelyn's godson, the first born of her best friend. Boy bumbles. He is scrawny and quiet. He only likes to smoke cigarettes and look at things. I like him. He's a good boy. He sees things simply. He's been living like a priest in the garage for a few years, sending his wages to his wife, who cares for his mother and his daughter back home.
"What's wrong at Records?" I ask.
"Boy thinks his boss doesn't like him. Talks behind Boy's back because he smokes."
"Because he smokes a pack a shift."
"I'm not defending him," she says. "I'm just asking because I told him I would."
"He's lucky he has a job."
"I know," she says.
"Is he home now?"
"No, he's working tonight."
"So we're alone?" Evelyn's eyes narrow as she nods. I lock the front door and lowers the window shades. "Good," I say.
The next morning I find Boy smoking on the porch. Boy is still wearing his work jumper. His boot laces are untied. "Hey, Boy."
"Hi, Uncle." The last of the cigarette burns to the butt and he stamps the ember on the sole of a boot, then flicks the butt out to the street.
"Your Auntie Evelyn told me you want to move to the cafeteria."
"Yes."
"What's wrong at Records?"
"Nothing."
"How's your boss?"
"He doesn't like me because I smoke cigarettes."
"But your boss smokes, too. I've seen him."
"He only smokes once a day." Boy says. "Maybe I'll just smoke less."
"Why do you want to be in the cafeteria?"
"A girl."
"Oh. Celia?" Celia is a young girl from Mexico who picked up English fast.
"Yes."
"You should just tell me, don't go to your aunt."
"Thank you," Boy said. Then he takes out a cigarette and lights it with Boss's Zippo. I know it is Boss's when I see the mustang bust.
I wait for Boy to shower before leaving for work. When the water runs, I go into the garage and dig for the Zippo in Boy's jumper pockets. They're empty. The running water stop, then the shower curtain slides open. I give a quick look around and see the Zippo by the lamp, which I pocket as I leave.
At work I wait until Boss leaves for lunch before I clean his office. I empty the trash cans and wipes all the windows and surfaces in the ground floor rooms, place the monthly supply order and work out the arrangements for floor buffing next week. I will plant the lighter in deep in the crevices of Boss's leather sofa while he's gone and tomorrow I'll find it while cleaning in Boss's presence.
Just before going out to lunch, Boss calls for me.
"Records tells me Boy's not working out," Boss says. "He says Boy takes too many cigarette breaks. He even sneaks off without asking."
"I heard, Boss. I talked to Boy myself this morning. He tells me he's going to smoke less."
"Wel, no matter. He's being let go."
"But, Boss. I've talked with him. He'll smoke less."
"No matter, Jun." Boss hands me a white envelope. "That's his paycheck. Just tell him to not worry about coming back."
"Okay, Boss."
Boss gets up. He tightens his tie and asks, "So, have you found my Zippo?"
"No, Boss. I don't know where to look."
"Ask around," Boss says. "Ask your buddies."
When I hand Boy the white envelope, he asks, "What's this?"
"Don't go to the campus anymore." Boy doesn't ask any questions. He just reaches for his cigarettes.
"I found a Zippo yesterday," Boy says. "But I've already lost it."
I can feel the Zippo in my pocket, the smooth weight of it against my thigh. Tonight I'll stash it, in the back my sock drawer maybe in the little green pouch where I keep the dried bit of umbilical cord I saved from when my son was a baby. Or maybe I'll just keep it in my pocket. Keep it with me, a little fire whenever I need it.
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Jason Conde
18 June 2008
English 410
Prof. Crowder
Boss
Boss's Zippo is missing. "It was stolen, Jun," Boss says while I empty the trash can. The Zippo once belonged to Boss's brother, who died in Vietnam just after he had the bust of a mustang engraved on one side."Someone stole it, Boss?" I ask as I double-line the trash can.
"Well, how else would it be lost. You think I'd misplace it?"
"No, Boss."
"Then how would it be lost?"
"You're right, Boss. I just didn't think of it." I laugh nervously as he dusts the electrical wires behind the desk. It's important for Boss that I take the dusting seriously. Boss once said, "Dust is like kindling. All you need is a spark and the whole thing burns."
That night Evelyn says, "Boy wants to know if you can pull strings with Boss so he can move to the cafeteria." Boy is Evelyn's godson, the first born of her best friend. Boy bumbles. He is scrawny and quiet. He only likes to smoke cigarettes and look at things. I like him. He's a good boy. He sees things simply. He's been living like a priest in the garage for a few years, sending his wages to his wife, who cares for his mother and his daughter back home.
"What's wrong at Records?" I ask.
"Boy thinks his boss doesn't like him. Talks behind Boy's back because he smokes."
"Because he smokes a pack a shift."
"I'm not defending him," she says. "I'm just asking because I told him I would."
"He's lucky he has a job."
"I know," she says.
"Is he home now?"
"No, he's working tonight."
"So we're alone?" Evelyn's eyes narrow as she nods. I lock the front door and lowers the window shades. "Good," I say.
The next morning I find Boy smoking on the porch. Boy is still wearing his work jumper. His boot laces are untied. "Hey, Boy."
"Hi, Uncle." The last of the cigarette burns to the butt and he stamps the ember on the sole of a boot, then flicks the butt out to the street.
"Your Auntie Evelyn told me you want to move to the cafeteria."
"Yes."
"What's wrong at Records?"
"Nothing."
"How's your boss?"
"He doesn't like me because I smoke cigarettes."
"But your boss smokes, too. I've seen him."
"He only smokes once a day." Boy says. "Maybe I'll just smoke less."
"Why do you want to be in the cafeteria?"
"A girl."
"Oh. Celia?" Celia is a young girl from Mexico who picked up English fast.
"Yes."
"You should just tell me, don't go to your aunt."
"Thank you," Boy said. Then he takes out a cigarette and lights it with Boss's Zippo. I know it is Boss's when I see the mustang bust.
I wait for Boy to shower before leaving for work. When the water runs, I go into the garage and dig for the Zippo in Boy's jumper pockets. They're empty. The running water stop, then the shower curtain slides open. I give a quick look around and see the Zippo by the lamp, which I pocket as I leave.
At work I wait until Boss leaves for lunch before I clean his office. I empty the trash cans and wipes all the windows and surfaces in the ground floor rooms, place the monthly supply order and work out the arrangements for floor buffing next week. I will plant the lighter in deep in the crevices of Boss's leather sofa while he's gone and tomorrow I'll find it while cleaning in Boss's presence.
Just before going out to lunch, Boss calls for me.
"Records tells me Boy's not working out," Boss says. "He says Boy takes too many cigarette breaks. He even sneaks off without asking."
"I heard, Boss. I talked to Boy myself this morning. He tells me he's going to smoke less."
"Wel, no matter. He's being let go."
"But, Boss. I've talked with him. He'll smoke less."
"No matter, Jun." Boss hands me a white envelope. "That's his paycheck. Just tell him to not worry about coming back."
"Okay, Boss."
Boss gets up. He tightens his tie and asks, "So, have you found my Zippo?"
"No, Boss. I don't know where to look."
"Ask around," Boss says. "Ask your buddies."
When I hand Boy the white envelope, he asks, "What's this?"
"Don't go to the campus anymore." Boy doesn't ask any questions. He just reaches for his cigarettes.
"I found a Zippo yesterday," Boy says. "But I've already lost it."
I can feel the Zippo in my pocket, the smooth weight of it against my thigh. Tonight I'll stash it, in the back my sock drawer maybe in the little green pouch where I keep the dried bit of umbilical cord I saved from when my son was a baby. Or maybe I'll just keep it in my pocket. Keep it with me, a little fire whenever I need it.
Read more!
Start Up
Hi guys. Hopefully everyone has been set up properly as a blog author. Explore the blog a bit, familiarize yourselves with all the functions. If there are any problems on your end, let me know and we'll try to figure things out.
Jason
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Jason
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